Tuesday, June 14, 2011

DAY 2 -- meeting our daughter

Alright, I'm typing on a laptop that I hate so many errors & i'm frankly too tired to fix.  There, you've been warned of spelling.  LOL.  We got up, ate bananas and water and we're ready.  We went on a very long road trip to the region of Kurdzhali.  Pronounced nothing like it spelled btw.  Very scenic.  However, we went through bumpy mountainous roads.  Nascar has nothing on this woman!  I literally closed my eyes.  I was so nauseous, the one gas station we stopped at, I had to take something.  It was between pepto and dramamine & w/ meeting Summer soon, Pepto it was.  Hey, as fellow adoptive parents know, you do anything to meet the kids. 

After dodging a few cows and goats in the road (no, I'm not joking), we made it to the orphanage.  Typical iron gates and very run down building.  Got out of the car & there is a crowd gathered by the enterance.  Walked up the stairs and this little girl starts running to me giving me the biggest squeeze.  She didn't want to go to dad yet but hung onto me for a little while.  Little did I know, that would be my last hug for quite some time.  We go inside and are taken down the hall.  Pass her bedroom.  There were a few other kids about but not many.  Went to the meeting room and played.  She did not want to warm up at all so decided to go outside for a bit.  Went to what they call a playground.  Folks, I'll have a separate post on the poor conditions of this orphanage.  For now, this is all about Summer.  She is 4 years old.  VERY healthy despite all medical reports we were recently given.  She's fine.  Medically.  Emotionally, we'll talk about in a bit.  Deep scars.  Summer is so pretty.  And I'm not just saying that b/c she's my daughter.  She is absolutely stunning.  The biggest brown eyes and long eye lashes.  Beautiful black hair.  Olive skin as she is of Turkish origin.  Gorgeous all the way.  She is developmentally on track in my opinion.  We've done this enough to know.  Soft voice but very bright.  Cutest squeezable cheeks you've ever seen.  We played in the sandbox for qutie some time tyring to get her to open up.  Also got to ask some questions regarding Summer.  Basic stuff really.  No allergies, she never gets sick, etc.  Great stuff.  Left the boiling pot and went to lunch.  The outside temp had to be in the high 80's low 90's and humid.  Not to mention, sand box doubled as an ant mound.  CAn't believe they let the kids play in there butnothing you can do about it. 
Anyhow, went to the hotel.  Nice hotel.  Bigger room and smelled better.  No smoke either.  Ordered lunch.  These portions were enough for an ogre.  I could not get over how big it was.  But delicious considering it had been a few days since real food.  Filled up and went back to the orphanage.  Required to visit twice a day.  Came back to see her and got out a few toys from the bag.  She was crying.  She is always crying.  This is not typical shyness.  At first we thought it was.  It's not.  There is something a bit deeper going on for sure.  I won't disclose all her history of course yet as she is not officially our daughter till court.  Just suffice it to say, she needs some time and space to adjust to new situations.  this will be one of them.  It will not be an easy road.  That's for sure.  For one, I am positive no one will want to be on our flight home. LOL.  However, we did get a few smiles and a few laughs out of her.  Enough to know the potential is there to heal for sure.  I am in love with this little girl.  So much to say about her.  Her soft skin, sweet laugh, little hidden smiles, etc.  I will tell more.  We left that first day knowing this was our daughter.  On the way up to the orphanage doors, Warren had one hand, I had the other, swinging our daughter w/ giggles  you could hear and see.  A change from earlier where there was nothing but tears.  However, at first, Warren couldn't get within 2 meters of this little girl.  Then we asked the caretakers if she had ever had contact w/ any men.  No.  So, she'd never really been exposed to men before so this too was new for her.  She would follow Warren w/ her eyes.  If he got w/ in her range, she'd scream.  Warren handled it like a pro though. 

We left though knowing we'd come back the next day and try to break down some more walls.  We had dinner at the hotel.  best spaghetti ever!  Tried to sleep that night but soon discovered Fred Flintstone had to have a softer bed than we did.  The agony of not sleeping.  Ouch!  AGain, she's worth every bit of the sickness, pain, sleep deprivation and anything else you can throw out there.  We retired for the night and woke up today, Tuesday.  Write about Day 3 in a bit here.  There will be pictures but not right now. Computer is doing all kinds of funky stuff.  Much more to come.  Reading between  the lines and how to cope w/ a child you meet that wants to just cry.  It can be done. 

2 comments:

  1. So glad you got to meet her!! Time and love changes things! Not always the way we want, but in ways we never would expect! We have someone who is very nervous to tears in new situations...and we have Barney Rubble's bed!!! :)

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  2. So excited for you Stephanie. I can't wait to see pictures. Praying for all of you!!!

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