Saturday, November 6, 2010

Sad eyes

It's hard to write this post.  I know I said I'd write another post but I fear we will have to make a heartbreaking decision soon.  It involves a very beloved member of our family:

This is Bear.  He is 13 years old and is our flat-coated retriever.  Actually, he's not just a dog.  He's not just any dog.  He's our dog, our "teddy bear."  The kids have all grown up with Bear.  They know no other dog.  Well, they knew our dog Aspen too but he passed away 2 years ago this month.  Bear is 125 lbs.  He has puppy fur still if you can believe it.  So soft.  Vet always ask what we do to get his fur so soft. Umm, forget to bathe him?  LOL.  

Bear is the best dog.  No, really, we have the BEST dog ever!  He is so tolerable. Our kids are the roughest.  With 4 boys, you're going to have wrestling and yes, sometimes it will involve the dog.  Bear has never bitten any of our kids nor the ones I sit for no matter what they've done to him.  True.  Bear is loyal.  Everyday, he goes outside rain or shine to wait for Warren to get home from work.  

I could use so many adjectives to describe our dog.  Friend, companion, loyal, loving, fun, etc.  Too many words to use.  But lately, we've had to use words like sad, hurting, lithless.  I can not tell you the gut feeling I've got.  We know Bear's time left on earth is limited.  Very limited.  Yesterday, he did not leave his spot all day.   Not even to go outside.  His fur feels differently.  His eyes look so sad.  Yet, he wags his tail like crazy when you pass by him.  He can still get up and down the steps outside but he can barely get up off the floor at home.  We are torn on whether to take him to the vet.  Deep down, I think we know his time is limited.  His tumors may have become cancerous at this point.  They're huge now.  He has Cushings Disease.  He has arthritis.  Yet, until recently, he never complained about it at all.  Not a whimper or a yelp.  We are hoping and praying that yesterday was just a bad day for him.  Next few days we're taking a lot into consideration.  We knew when it was getting close for Aspen to leave us.  We know Bear will not make it till next Christmas.  We are questioning whether he will make it to this Christmas right now.  It is beyond difficult to talk about.  BTW, this is "Warren's dog."  This dog LOVES Warren to death.  We have never, ever not had a dog in this house.  Never.  I am NOT writing Bear off folks however, I am being cautiously optimistic at this point that he has a few more months left.  Maybe weeks, maybe less.  No one knows.  We just know Bear hurts, and we will not let him suffer.  He deserves no less.  

Right now, it is hard to look at him b/c I know he hurts.  I want to make it all better but know I can't.  Like I said, this dog had it all.  He was the glue here.  Everyone loved him and he really does help some of our traumatized ones through their tough times.  When Alex was having a tough time w/ Bojan's surgery, he was right there petting Bear.  Bear was willing of course.  We love our teddy bear.  Always have, always will.  For however long we can, we will love him.  I'm calling the vet Monday and asking for some more Rimydl for Bear for pain.  If that does not ease it at all, we will have to think of some other options.  

this is not a picture of a sad old dog.  This is a picture of a dog that has lived a very full and happy life.  He's been able to be outside when he wants, eat way better than most of the humans in this house--LOL, have someone around to pet him any time, chase as many squirrels as he was able in his life time-- catching a few of them, going camping w/ us, going on rides in the car when he used to be able to jump better, a dog that was terrified of balloons,  terrified of thunder, and is loved by many, many people.  He is truly one of the Boyd Bunch.  You will never know just how much we love this dog of ours.  I don't even want to think of parting with him.  It will be losing a family member.  So much more I could say about our Bear.  I'll let you know how he is feeling this coming week.  If you can, say a little prayer for our Teddy Bear.  We love you!  Thanks for letting me share just a tad bit of our beloved dog Bear.  Right now, kids are watching Toy Story 3 and Bear is being petted by one of them.  Years ago, when Warren and I were going to the fairgrounds to look around, we never planned on coming home with a dog.  Never.  Plans change and Bear changed all our lives...for the better. 


  1. Having met Bear, I can truthfully agree with all your descriptive words. Going through the same thing with our 14 year old lab/beagle/chow mix, Kelsey, right now, as well. Totally crying while reading your post. I will keep Bear close to my heart and prayers while we wait an see...