Sunday, September 19, 2010

On our minds

Figured I'd catch up on a few things since we've been so busy lately.  I know I haven't written in here lately as much as I'd like to.  I also haven't put everything that is going on lately either.  Lots of it I'm sure you all wouldn't care about.  You know, like the kids last night chasing a stupid tree frog all over the kitchen.  Or, my fake vomit kid.  (more on that one later in the post).  As far as Warren and I go, we have been rather exhausted lately.  Not going to lie.  It happens.  It's life.  Lots on our minds for sure.  So despite us wanting & intending to go to church this morning, we realized that at 10 o'clock, no one was ready, Alex was fighting w/ I forget whom, and no one had eaten breakfast.  It was not a stellar morning for the Boyds for sure.  So, going to the church cookout this afternoon and definitely attending service next Sunday morning.  It was an outage weekend this weekend so Warren worked all day Saturday.  So, we did not end up going to Centerfest in Durham.  Kids and I cleaned the house.  Pinesol type of cleaning.  I was appalled & ashamed at how some of the dust bunnies had built up.  There are at least 11 kids here everyday but that is definitely NO excuse.  We pulled fridges out, moved stuff to sweep & dust under, etc.  Deep cleaning.  Does it look like we worked that hard?  No.  Not a bit.  Oh well, we did.  I feel better knowing floors are mopped and laundry is completed.

Okay, some things on our minds.

# 1 adoption.  I already did an adoption update so not bothering w/ repeating.  Just a couple posts back.  Main thing we have to work on is the fund raising.  I know we can do it.  Just need to work on it.

#2 on our minds is moving.  Yes, we must move.  We have finally come to the conclusion that no matter how much we love our house or our neighborhood, there really is just no way we can stay.  The house has really been outgrown.  When the other kids get here, there will be 5 boys in the front bedroom from ages 7 to 15.  Back room will have 3 girls ages 3 to 11.  And then Yana and Irina will have rooms downstairs.  Though the upstairs rooms are huge bonus type rooms, it is still not quite enough.  Plus, putting adult children w/ elementary age is not a good idea & that is the situation we'll have in a few years if we were to stay.  We have decided to fix up the house over the next few months and then put it on the market in April.  What some of you don't realize is in order to move to this home, we had to take a $30K loss on the last home as it literally fell apart.  Shady developer & builder & truly a long story.  We really want minimal loss from this home.  All depends on how the market holds up over the next few months.  Homes in this area are still selling so hopeful.  But, you really never know.  Biggest question, is where on earth would we go.  Warren really doesn't want to live any further than an hour out from his job.  I agree.  This does mean different county for schools and housing.  We would love to have some acreage and build our own home.  Most likely though, that probably won't happen.  We don't need fancy for sure.  Just some space.  So, working on where we can go for right now.  Remember, we have many different disabilities and school is  a huge factor for us.

#3 on our minds is schooling.  It is very, very apparent the kids are not getting the education they should here.  Not by a long shot.  It really is sad.  Alex & Max are handing homework in, getting a hundred on it, and it is literally almost all wrong.  I kid you not.  I stopped helping them last week just to see what they could do & to see what the teacher would do or say.  You know what the teachers did or said?  That's right...nothing.  Not a word of concern.  They checked off the homework, nothing was corrected.  Max brings home a progress report w/ all hundreds on assignments(b/c he does do them) but fails every single test/quiz.  Now he does have documented learning disability in math and most FAS kids do.  However, don't you think the teacher would have thought something was up or maybe have at least checked the homework?  No.  I'm honestly almost all out of fight.  Nothing has been resolved quite yet in Irina's situation either.  Still waiting for the admin at the WJHS to get back to me.  Umm, yeh right.  Some of the assignments my kids are getting are such a waste of time too.  So much could be learned.  So much more than what is being learned.  My children do not know the basic stuff most should know.  I have spent the last week requesting meetings and writing in stupid agenda notebooks of theirs. I am documenting everything that is happening.  I hate this w/ a passion.  Just hate their schooling situation and want to pull them immediately.  Irina calls her high school the prison.  Everyday she says why do you send me to that prison.  The guilt is building.  I wanted to pull them after the first week.  They will indeed be pulled from school.  I am just having to work it all out right now and that will take a little more time.  I have to make sure the high school homeschool rules are the same.  It is much, much different homeschooling a special needs student in high school.  Trying to figure it out.  More is going on w/ the other kids too in school. 

#4 on our minds is the social security mess.  As some on here know, Max & Irina were adopted in 1999.  Their ss cards read as though they are aliens and they are not.  They are full fledged US citizens.  To fix this, I need to get them US passports.  Sent those off weeks ago.  Get a letter in the mail last week saying we need to send more stuff in.  Did that and now we wait.  However, we need this done immediately, especially for Irina.  See, once the passports are in, we have to find someone that can fix this mess w/ their cards at the social security office.  After that, we have very limited time to apply for Irina's SSI before she hits 18yo in December.  Our neurologist said it is imperative we apply before she is 18yo or the waiting list can be years and years even after she is an adult.  hoping & praying those cards come in soon. 

#5 on our minds is Nik's upcoming surgery.  Granted, he has had this surgery before & we know what to expect.  BUT, this time it will make him completely deaf w/out any implants on.  No more yelling at him in the pool or the street if he doesn't have his implant on.  He won't be able to hear me.  Nik does have residual hearing in his unimplanted ear right now.  They take this away when the implant is done.  Now, he will be able to hear much, much better and I do know this will benefit him more than ever once he's activated.  However, it does not make it any easier as a parent.  Any surgery is hard to do but having to weigh the options of making your son totally deaf w/out any devices on, is a little different.  The decision has been made, we're confident about it w/out a doubt. But, doesn't take the "worry" away as a parent.  Nik is very, very excited about his implant.  And today at the church picnic talk to someone whose father is bilateral implant.  When he had the HA & CI, it was difficult for him to distinguish sounds he said.  With both, he is doing fantastic.  We pray this will be the case w/ Nik too.  But remember, Nik has AN(auditory neuropathy) which is a bit different.  I have heard nothing but positive about bilateral CI users who have AN.  October 13th is the day. 

#6 on our minds is Irina's TB test.  Now, she has to have a TB test in order to work w/ her program at school.  I have literally not had the chance to take her at all this weekend.  We are expecting her to test positive as she had the BCG vaccine in Russia.  If she does test positive, they will give me a script for a chest x-ray elsewhere so we get immediate reads.  Fine.  It will show clear.  Then have to go back to doc explaining the positive results.  She's already agreed to write a letter to the school explaining why Irina would be testing positive.  So, taking her tomorrow & then we have to wait for the read.  Never dull here, huh?  

There is more on our minds but too tired to write it out.  LOL.  Will have some pictures tomorrow for sure.  Hope everyone had a great weekend.  I know we did.  Church picnic was so much fun tonight.  This week is Yana's birthday and lots going on.  More to come.  Just wanted to explain why I wasn't posting quite as much lately.  Basically, life. 

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