Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Older child adoption

Some have asked some questions on the previous Stavropol Orphanage post.  For those new, no you are not supposed to post pictures of other children.  However, after over 6 years, there would be no way to really identify those children.  Those children are now preteens in Alex's group and the ones in Yana's group are young adults.  Not really any identifying info I put on them either except their region.  I do know the fate of some as we still keep in touch w/ Yana's Godmother.  She truly has been a blessing to those girls.  Uses her own money to take them to the dentist or what have you.  Been by their side for some cleft surgeries.  She is truly a hero in my eyes and one day, hope to help her out.  I feel to this day she is the one that helped Yana out when transferring to that orphanage.  She calls her every year for her birthday.  Anyhow, normally I do not post orphanage pictures but these are so old, I don't think it matters a whole lot.  I actually think it helps to let folks know these kids exist, they are precious, and they need a home and family.  Older kids, just as much as the young ones.

We have never adopted a child younger than 3yo.  Alex was the youngest at 3yo, almost 4yo.  Yet, every single adoption we started out thinking we'd adopt an infant or young toddler.  I can tell you those of you who are afraid like we were at first that you'd somehow "miss out" on their childhood, not a bit!  We experienced many firsts w/ the kids and they are able to express how they feel about those firsts.  I will never forget the first time Max experienced poprocks gum or Irina ate a candy bar for the first time.  Or when Alex played in the water for the first time or was thrown up in the air & caught by loving arms for a change.  All these things are firsts for us to witness.  Though I have no experience w/ my own babies, I do have experience w/ my sister & her firsts as a baby.  I was 13 yo older than her.  I also do sitting of babies.  I can tell you the firsts when you adopt older children are just as amazing.  I watched my sister take her first steps.  It was wonderful.  But the feelings I had for our son being thrown up & caught for the first time w/out fear, were just as wonderful.  Watching their faces light up as you touch them or kiss them or hug them.  That is something they don't get in the orphanage every night....a goodnight kiss.  Yana was 8.5 years old when we brought her home.  Watching her transform over the years has been an experience we will never forget.  Not going to kid you all.  It was NOT all roses. But to see our 14yo (almost 15yo) now, you can see the person that was hiding inside.  She wants to do early college in high school!  Watching your child learn english for the first time or hear for the first time is just as rewarding I feel as those first steps that I too thought I'd miss out on.  I can assure you adopting older children you will experience many firsts.

Older child adoption is not for the faint of heart.  You have to go in it w/ an open mind and a battle plan.  Hey, I'm not kidding about that battle plan.  These children can test you.  They have a strong mind at an older age and some believe it or not, are set in their ways.  Some will put up a strong front but you can indeed break through.  

this post originally started off w/ me going to tell about how my 7 are doing.  I think I'll leave it as is and change the title.  I have a friend coming over in a bit.  Kids and I are going to do a little cleaning up but keeping things simple today.  Irina and Max want to study for their big test tomorrow.  Driver's ed.  Watch out!  Need to get going.  I will have another post later on how my kids are doing medically and such.  Sometimes my mind wanders and the posts stray.  Oh well.  I'm also digging through some old pics as well.  Who knows what will show up.  Fun  looking through though and seeing how the kids have changed. 

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